Avoid stress on your big day!
As a Celebrant, I see many people who are very stressed out on their big day. They are so stressed that they find it hard to enjoy their own wedding. Here’s some helpful information to make your special day stress free! This day is very important to all concerned, and therefore it is essential that care and planning ensure that the wedding proceeds smoothly.
Be clear and strong about your plans
Weddings are something that everyone has an opinion on. Sometimes I see a couple before they have spoken to anyone else about their big day. The next time I see them, all their original plans have changed, because well meaning people ‘got in their ear’. Before they knew it, others took over and changed their great ideas to theirs. Be prepared to stand strong about your vision for your big day unless you want it hijacked by other people’s dreams.
Remember the reasons you decided to marry
Remember to factor in some romance into your busy schedules. Your relationship should always take priority over wedding planning. Hugs, kisses and cuddles all lower our stress levels.
Bucks and Hens Nights
If you and your wedding party and friends are planning a Bucks and Hens Night, it is a great idea to plan it at least a week out from the wedding date. That way the wedding party and guests can enjoy your special day free from tiredness and hangovers which can spoil the experience for all concerned. You do want to look and feel your best.
Looking at your Site
Jody and Nick’s Stradbroke Island Beach Wedding by Tamzin
Check out your wedding site at the exact time you are having your wedding. This is especially important if it is
an outdoor venue. That way you can choose to stand in the best spot for the light at the time you have chosen. You can see where the sun and the shadows are and not face yourself into bright sunlight.
What about Outdoor Locations?
If your ceremony is located in a park or public garden, booking may be required with the local authority. Punctual attendance will be required to avoid overlapping with other wedding parties. Check how much time is allowed for the completion of your ceremony.
When considering ceremonies in parks of outdoor locations, consider also the availability of toilets, parking facilities, seating and shade or shelter. Fold-up chairs may be needed for elderly guests.
The beach although a beautiful spot, is not the best location for a wedding ceremony. Beach weddings are usually very windy, noisy events. The waves are quite loud and celebrants usually do not like taking their very expensive sound systems onto the beach as sand or moisture can ruin them. Although we are happy to perform ceremonies at the site of your choice, we do advise looking at the grassy foreshore for your wedding and having your romantic pictures taken on the beach afterwards.
What about the Weather?
Weather has to be taken into account also, with heat/sun, cold, rain and wind as possible considerations. An alternative venue is necessary with any outdoor location. Consider the comfort of your guests, as most arrive 20-30 minutes prior to the ceremony. If there are a large number of people and no seating is provided, it can be very uncomfortable indeed – especially so if there is no protection from the sun or rain or high winds. If there is a possibility of rain, ensure that there is a LARGE umbrella in the wedding car.
Keep Hydrated
Be sure to drink sufficient water during the day before the ceremony and remember to eat and drink on the big day. If it is a very hot day and your ceremony is to be held in an outdoor location, arrange for some bottled water to be available. You and your guests will be very thirsty.
A few things to help with wedding nerves.
- Just before the big day, try and have a massage or relaxing spa day.
- Be as organised as possible.
- Be on time.
- Don’t leave preparations until the last minute, it causes stress.
- Have a crew of helpful people with lists, so that everyone knows their role on the day.
- If you do have an alcoholic drink make it only one. (your Celebrant is not allowed to marry you if you are under the influence of alcohol or drugs)
- Have a good night’s sleep, tiredness exacerbates nervousness and stress.
- The best thing you can do for yourself is to take deep breaths to calm yourself. 10 deep breaths in and out have a very calming effect. Keep doing it until you do feel okay.
- Plant a smile on your dial. Research shows that even if you are feeling stressed a big smile will trick your body into releasing happy hormones and also calm you down. Before you know it you will be happy and calm.
Babies, Small Children & Animals at the Ceremony
Some say never work with children or animals, but involving them in your wedding ceremony can be fun and meaningful. It must be remembered that randomness is hard to plan for, so consider this carefully. With respect, unless participating in the ceremony itself, babies, small children or animals should be encouraged to be located on the fringes of the wedding party! This avoids them stealing the show or ruining the ceremony. It happens! – A young child does not understand how to sit or stand still and quietly and can disrupt the ceremony, especially if they are chatty. As a consequence, you will not be heard by your guests or on your video. All of these plans are up to you, just be aware that intimate moments can be absolutely ruined by unplanned interruptions.
What about Children in the Wedding Party?
Children in the wedding party itself seem to cope better with all the fuss and attention if they are four years or older and know what is expected of them. If you are using children in the wedding ceremony, it is important to have a person at the wedding organised and close by to look after the child during the ceremony or if they become restless. Please give them permission to come and get the child during the ceremony.
Hairdresser, Make up Artist and Photographer
When arranging your appointments with Hairdressers & Makeup, please ensure that the Bride gets done FIRST. This will enable you to be dressed and ready for any home photographs when the Photographer and Video Operator arrive.
Please ensure the photographer understands that the wedding commences ON TIME, This means that you and all the Bridal party have to be ready earlier, and the photographer arrives with plenty of time to take preparation and arrival photographs.
Avoid being unfashionably late!
It is not fashionable today for the bride to be late. Please try hard to keep to the agreed starting time for the ceremony. Late arrival of the Bride can cause numerous problems in the form of undue stress for the Groom, the Attendants, the Celebrant and your Guests; especially the elderly and young children. This is especially a problem if the ceremony is outdoors, in the sun, or wind, or if the location has another booking.
Groom on time!
Equally, of course this applies to the Groom. Both the Groom and his attendants should be on site at least 30 minutes before hand to be able to greet guests, and to be ready for the Photographer.
Schedule to arrive at the venue, several minutes before. Allow extra time for the traffic if the wedding is scheduled for a Saturday. Try and do a dummy run the week before at the same time to give you an idea of timing. Photographs at the car and organising your entry can take several minutes. It is better to have ample time for photographs on arrival than be rushed. You can always ‘circle the block’ if too early!
What If I Am Late For My Wedding?
Please contact someone at the location immediately, so arrangements can be made to best accommodate the unforseen delay.
Please remember, It is possible, particularly if your wedding is on the weekend, that your Celebrant has commitments both before and after your ceremony.
Bride
Things can go wrong
Remember even with the most diligent of plans, something can go wrong. Perfection is a fairy story, and does not happen in real life. Try not to sweat the small stuff, as those imperfections can turn into great memories from your big day.
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